“Possum, get out of the trash can. Leave that tape alone, Possum!”
I love me a good piece of crackly sticky tape. It’s fun to eat, crunchy like a little bird (not that I’ve ever gotten my paws on a little bird, but a guy can dream). After I munch the tape, I settle down in the trash can for a nice nap.
“Possum, get off the couch right now! Get. Off. The. Couch.”
The Big One in the house yowls a lot. She lunges at me and whoooo!!! I get a ride to the litter box. Cool! Let’s do it again. I could do this for hours, except that I need a nap.
“Possum, time for your meds. Come up here, buddy.”
Treats!! Treeeeeeattttttsss!! I love the way the Big One hugs me and waters my eyes. She never does that for SammySosa. I’m so special; I’m really special. I love me very much. Then the Big One opens my mouth and sticks in that fishy-tasting paste. I love fishy-tasting paste. Oh I do. It’s great just before a nap.
“Possum, stop eating SammySosa’s food!”
The gloppy stuff in my bowl is really tasty. The gloppy stuff in SammySosa’s bowl looks good, too. I’ll just take a bite. Um, really love this stuff. Move over, Sammy. Hey, I just invented stereo eating, a bite from this bowl, a bite from that bowl. Oh, SammySosa, stop complaining. Let’s take a nap.
“Possum, stay away from my laptop. Stop it, Possum. Go away!”
This flat shiny thing makes fun little clicks when I walk over it. Sometimes paper comes out of the white square thing over there. Gotta attack and kill that paper while it’s still moving. I have such a fun life. Okay, time for a nap.
“Possum, I’m trying to brush my teeth. Get out of the way. Possum!”
Every morning the Big One and I enjoy flowing water together. Moving water tastes way better than bowl water. I love the way the water runs over my face. I really do. I could drink like this for hours, except that I need a nap.
“Possum, sweetie, come here. Come sit in my lap and let me hug you, big boy.”
The Big One makes a lot of noise but has no idea how to communicate. It’s best that I don’t encourage this kind of whining. So hard on the ear. Just need to check that SammySosa isn’t in the chair with the Big One; I don’t like that. Yah, I’m good. That sunny spot on the floor looks perfect for a nap.